feelin' groovy

Sometimes I can't believe how lucky I am. How great my life is turning out to be. Walking through hell and coming out stronger. Lucky to be alive, to have the wonderful people I have in my life, to live in this great little town, and to be so happy.

And when I look at Julian, I am always blown away that such an amazing person is my child. I get to spend my days with him and Wade.

Julian is a music connoisseur. He loves all kinds of music, and spends hours in his room singing along to his favorite songs while he plays with his Star Wars guys. Lately, he's had a strong affinity for Simon and Garfunkel, particularly the song "59th St. Bride Song" or as most people know it, "Feelin' Groovy." It makes him happy. He told me recently that one of his favorite songs made him cry. I asked him why, and he told me, "Because it's just so beautiful."

We went on a walk this past weekend, and along the path were lamp posts. So Julian had to stop and sing "Feelin' Groovy" to one of them.



This nearly knocks me over. So innocent and sweet, and not at all worried what anyone else thinks. This is how I want to live my life.

firsts

This is a day of firsts for me. I played tennis for the very first time today, at age 28. I really don't know why I've never tried before. Well, there were a couple of goofing around attempts in high school, but this was for real. Wade was teaching me how to play because the entire time I was sick and lying on the couch for the last few months, he and Julian have been going to the tennis courts and playing. Julian has gotten quite good at hitting the ball, which I witnessed for the first time today. It's so fun to watch him be so coordinated at only 5 years old. And if you have spent any amount of time with me, you will know I am not into sports. I have never played on a team sport in my life, and absolutely refuse to watch sports on television. When the announcers talk, all I hear is, "blabbity bleebity blooooo." So for me to be interested in a sport is kind of a feat in itself. But more than just being interested and watching Julian and Wade play, I actually enjoyed it myself. Not saying that I was any good - but that's part of the fun. Everyone sucks at first, and that's okay.

And my other first? I unclogged the drain in my tub with hippie power. So basically, the tub and I smoked weed, lit some Nag Champa incense, and talked about The Man while we sat in my VW bus and braided each other's hair. Kidding. I'm not hippie enough to actually dig out the huge wad of hair (probably my own) that was causing the clog, that's just crazy and gross. As much of a feminist as I am, this is one instance where I'm happy to leave that job to the menfolk and just say, "eeewwwww!!!!" So instead, I packed the drain full of baking soda and then poured some white vinegar on top. It took a few rounds of vinegar pouring to dissolve all the baking soda, but now the drain empties nicely and I don't have to stand in a gross pool of dirty shampoo and soap water at the end of my shower. Hooray for natural remedies! I should also mention that I clean pretty much my entire house with baking soda and vinegar because it's cheap, earth-friendly, and works really well.

But I'm not washing my hair with baking soda and vinegar anymore because I think it was starting to dry the ends out and they looked kind of trashed. So I switched to Whole Foods' new line of shampoos and conditioners. They just reformulated all their products to be free of gluten, sodium lauryl sulfate, parabens, and other disgusting stuff that we shouldn't be putting on our bodies. Also, they're $2.99 a bottle. Score for thriftiness.

Now I bid you farewell as I go off to enjoy something not new at all, but a rather enjoyable routine of watching "Family Guy" and eating a brownie.

on whiskers and tears

You want to know what's super cute about pregnancy? Crying for no reason, and chin whiskers! Adorable!!

Seriously, I found myself crying today because John Lennon isn't alive anymore. It's not like I just learned about this. I'm aware of it constantly because of what a huge Beatles fan I am, and I regularly think about what kind of amazing music and political humanist things he could have accomplished if he hadn't been murdered. But today, for no reason at all, tears for this man who died 2 months before I was born.

And it's not just this. Stupid commercials? Now they make me cry. I don't even want to tell you how upset I get watching "Grey's Anatomy" now. Every effing episode of that show is a heart wrencher.

But the chin whiskers. Those are the real beauties. Teenagers, be aware of this. Let this be your birth control. Better yet, go visit a hospital and stand in the hallway of the maternity ward and listen to the women screaming while they give birth. That should be a pretty good deterrent. And if that's not enough, reconsider the chin whiskers. My chin has pubes. You know that's an image that you love to be left with.

the post in which i ramble on about pregnancy stuff

Oh goodness, I love this boy. Tonight, little Julian is sick with a fever and the sniffles. He'll have to stay home from school tomorrow because he has to be fever-free for 24 hours before he's allowed back. But not really a problem in his mind. Tomorrow will be a day filled with movie watching, which is forbidden during a normal school week. Sick days are an exception though.

I've been finding myself kind of lonely and bored with all this free time that I suddenly have now that Julian is in school. It's not that bad, because I'm free to take naps whenever I want, which is such a blessing since I'm pregnant and tired all the time. But I really do need to get cracking and work on recipes for the bakery. This week, the goal is to have all sorts of muffins perfected. And soon, I really would like to make some dairy-free items, in addition to everything being gluten-free. Those intolerances seem to go hand in hand, so it just makes sense. Especially for little kids. How much does it suck to be the kid who can't have gluten or dairy? A lot. So I want to help that kid out.

What else has been going on? I haven't posted on here in forever and feel like such a huge wanker. But honestly, I haven't been doing much at all and feel like my life is not so interesting right now. I've been doing a small bit of research into cloth diapering because I would really like to give that a go for this baby, and so far the top two brands that I've heard of from people are Fuzzi Bunz and Bum Genius. I know it will save money in the long run, but holy shit (no pun intended. heh.) cloth diapers are SO expensive! I know a lot of people register for this kind of thing, but I won't be doing that. First of all, this is my second baby and that's generally considered pretty tacky. But really, I'm just not the kind of person who registers for things. I didn't have a bridal shower or registry, and I didn't have a baby shower or registry with Julian. I feel like it's rude for me to list things I want and expect people to buy them for me. And I know that's absolutely crazy too, because when my friends get married or have babies, I absolutely want to buy them things and find registries helpful. But for some reason, I feel like for me to do it would be tacky. I just can't explain it. It's one of my mental hangups. So anyway, I won't be registering for things like cloth diapers, so I think I'm going to start buying them slowly over a period of time so it's not such a huge hit to the wallet. If any of you have any cloth diapering tips to chime in on, please please please tell me. I need all the advice I can get on this.

Right now marks 15 weeks in my pregnancy, and I have yet to take one profile belly shot, although I told myself I would do it. So I'm going to start doing that soon. Like next week. I'm not really showing that much yet though, to my surprise. I thought that since this is my second child, the belly would pop a lot sooner. Maybe because it's been almost 6 years since the last time around, my muscles had a chance to go back to normal? I don't know. But right now, I look more like a college girl with a beer baby than anything.

And if you will excuse me, I am going to go fulfill the pregnancy stereotype and eat some ice cream. I probably shouldn't admit it, but there are 5 cartons of ice cream in my freezer right now. It was on sale so I stocked up like crazy. They haven't all been cracked into yet, but I chuckle every time I open the freezer and see my stash.