moar bits

- I know I'm so late to the party, but I've really been loving Louis C.K. lately. We don't have cable, so pretty much everything I watch is way late, because I wait for it to be available on Netflix. Last night, we watched his standup show, "Hilarious" and it really was. I laughed so hard that all the muscles in my throat and neck were hurting. He's got that fine balance of being so funny that you hurt yourself laughing, and being so depressing with his truths that you feel like jumping in front of a bus. He talked about how stupid it is for adults to hit kids, and while it was all very funny, it was so true and awful that it made my stomach hurt a little. I think he might be my favorite comic ever.

- My birthday is next month, and I want to have a party. But here's the dilemma: it's also Wade's birthday. And Audrey's is the day before. Realistically, I will not be having a party because it means that I will have to make Audrey's cake, and then my own. That's just crazy. Also, Wade doesn't want to have a party. I could just be all, "Screw you, Wilson. I want a birthday party." But since it's his birthday too, and he's expressed that he doesn't feel like cooking and cleaning up after a bunch of people on his birthday also, I get screwed in the process. I mean, I know it sounds petty. I do. "Boo hoo, I don't get to have a birthday party." Whatever. I just want to do something fun on my birthday for once. I never get to go out and do anything because I have kids, and really haven't felt that anyone has given a shit about me on my birthday since I was little. I'll stop my whining about my white people problems now. (By the way, that totally wasn't a plea for anyone to make anyone feel guilty or that they have to go and do birthday stuff for me, because that's not what I'm after at all, but I felt that I had to mention this because you guys are so nice that it's crazypants.)

- Audrey just now informed that a Care Bear pooped in her pants.

- My dog's toenails are so long that it looks like she's walking on stilts.

- I have been doing really well lately with limiting myself to only 2 cups of coffee a day, rather than letting the coffee flow freely like some never ending river of delicious bean juice. But I still think about cookies and candy all the time. And the worst time of day is at night, around 9:00, after the kids have gone to bed and I just want to stuff cookies into my facehole. Except that I've made a point of not keeping any of that stuff around, so at 9:00 every night, I get all anxious. But I bought some Chimes Ginger Chews from World Market, and they are a healthy-ish alternative to eating a pile of cookies, and I only need one or two to satiate the need for shoving foods into my facehole at night. Do any of you feel like this at night?

- I haven't washed my face with anything other than olive oil for over a month now, and it's great. It makes so much sense, I don't know why I didn't think of it before. Here's a bit of information about it, if you're curious.